The boys and I kissed Reservoir Mum goodbye at 7.30am this morning and we won’t be seeing her until tomorrow arvo because she’s going straight from work to Crown Casino where she’ll be partying and playing and hanging with her Mum and Aunties and cousins for a ‘Ladies Night’ which sounds both sexist and fun. 

Since she left I’ve been feeling a little sad and a little amorous and a little sad and a little amorous and as usual I turn to music when I’m swamped by hormones and emotion and it occurred to me that the songs I was dialling up on my iPhone had a bit of a pattern to them and so here there are, a playlist for my lonely soul, which I hope other men will benefit from whenever they’re left home alone by their thrill-seeking wives. This order of songs is for the lonely, forsaken, horny-but-too-sad-to-act-on-it-until-just-before-nigh-nighs Dads out there. Let me know what songs keep you afloat. Peace! (I’ve never used the word peace in this context before.)

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‘I Will Survive’ by Gloria Gaynor

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Fireworks’ by Katy Perry (Katy Perry!!)

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‘Strong Enough’ by Cher

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‘I Don’t Need A Man’ by The Pussycat Dolls

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‘Against All Odds’ by Phil Collins

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‘How To Hide Your Feelings’ by Man Overboard

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‘My Ding-A-Ling’ by Chuck Berry

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‘Baby Come Back To Me’ by Player

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Nothing Compares To You’ by Sinead O’Connor

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