About once a year the skin on the back of my neck starts to prickle in anticipation because I sense the approach of Karen from The Walrus And The Carpenter Toy Store and that can only mean two things – I am going to get a rundown on her sex life and receive a generous give-away to offer Reservoir Dad readers. I like both of those things equally.
Last year, after presenting me with an amazing Kidcraft Expresso Kitchen as a prize ( like it was a left over pretzel made spongy by the beer and grease of yesterday’s BBQ and not an amazing kid’s toy worth almost four hundred bucks!) she went on to inform me that she’d changed her hair style because her hairdresser promised her she’d look like Michelle Williams and get laid. She followed this up with, ‘Neither of his statements were true.’
This year Karen said, ‘I was going to run my own give-away on Facebook that said you can have anything in the store for free if you can get me a shag but my staff thought it was inappropriate’ as she handed over two amazing prizes worth one hundred and eighty bucks a piece. I looked her right in the eyeballs and said, ‘You’re hiring the wrong kind of staff, Karen.’
Karen is a wonderful and gorgeous woman of Scottish descent with a sense of humor so similar to mine that I was once forced to ask my parents if I’d ever had a Siamese twin and although I can now rule that possibility out, I’m still suspicious that maybe my Dad made an error of judgment forty or so years ago and that Karen and I are half brother and sister.
Anyway, Karen has given away over two thousand dollars worth of prizes on this website over the past four years and I’m starting to notice a pattern: when Karen’s sex life nose dives she starts off-loading toys and that’s a good thing for just about everyone (except Karen who’s out of pocket and still in her pants, less rich but twice as randy, flaunting her assets like she flaunts her…. I better leave it there.)
I highly recommend you go chat to Karen and check out her amazing toy store, 771 Nicholson Street, Carlton. The benefits to you are obvious – meet a charismatic peddler of playthings, encounter some truly mind blowing toys and meet some of the wonderful nun-like staff. There is an added bonus you probably didn’t see coming which Karen details in this text she sent to me during last year’s give-away…
Right, let’s get into this year’s give-away!
Two Prizes for two lucky readers.
A BRUDER six wheel truck with forklift
Description: This six-wheeler even includes a forklift for fun and hefty lifting and loading! Kids will have hours of fun operating the fully functional forklift on the Bruder Scania R-series Container Truck with Forklift. Controlled steering, adjustable fork width and up-and-down motion make play seem like the real thing! The cabin of the container truck includes doors that really open and close, as well as folding mirrors. The container features rear swinging doors and support legs for safe loading. The container can even be detached and disassembled for added fun!
A GOTZ Precious Day Jessica doll
Use the Raffle Copter box below to complete three easy steps for your chance to win…
1) Like the Reservoir Dad Facebook Page.
2) Like the Walrus And The Carpenter Toy Store Facebook Page.
3) Visit the Walrus And The Carpenter Facebook Page and leave a message letting Karen know if you’d like to win the Bruder Truck or the Gotz Doll.
Competition will end Next Tuesday when one winner will be chosen for each prize.