Click The C(l)ock With The Cat In The Hat

For a while, any animal Lewis encountered, from a stink beetle right up to an elephant, was a cat. We could be out for a walk and see a dog in the park and Lewis would shout, ‘Cat, Daddy! Wook! Cat! Cat!’ Same could occur at the Zoo if we saw a monkey or a lion or a seal. It was always good for a laugh for Reservoir Mum and I and even funny to people close by – “Aww, look at the cute little kid calling the seagull a cat.”

Naughty Words!

Shortly after Lewis realised that there were different names for all the animals in the world he began to work on his colors. If he saw something red or yellow or green he would yell, ‘Purple Daddy! Wook! Purple! Purple!’

Law of averages meant that every now and then he’d be correct in yelling cat while actually pointing to a cat or yelling purple while actually pointing to something purple. Whenever this happened I’d just look at the approving expressions of passers-by and give them the yes-my-son’s-a-genius nod. These two word obsessions were always a source of amusement and something Reservoir Mum and I could take in our stride. It was temporary, it was a little funny and there was no risk of Lewis offending anyone. But Lewis’s new word obsession is a little different.

Ever since we started reading the “Dr Seuss Tell The Time” book he has taken to searching out clocks everywhere we go – in supermarkets, town halls, on peoples’ wrists etc. This would be just as innocuous as ever if he could pronounce it properly.

It was a little awkward at the Chemist yesterday as we were waiting for a script to be filled. Lewis lifted his gaze from a tray of reduced-price vitamins and focused on the man who had his hand in his front pocket and a big round-faced watch on his wrist. I saw what was unfolding and quickly reached for a bottle of vitamins as a means of distraction. It was a useless tactic however. Lewis began pointing madly in the direction of the man’s groin and shouting, ‘Cock Daddy. Wook! Cock! Cock!’

Unfortunately for me, the law of averages was at work again. Lewis just happened to be yelling ‘cock’ while pointing in the general vicinity of an actual penis. I don’t know if I was imagining it but I seemed to detect a sense of uncertainty behind the head-tilting smiles of those around us. The receptionist did seem to turn away from us a lot quicker than people usually do when they see a cute kid say something funny. Probably didn’t help that I did a 360 degree pirouette in a personal best time saying ‘cLock, Lewis, you mean c–LLL–ock.’ to anyone within ear shot.

Thanks a lot Dr Seuss.